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Set The Stage for Impact: How to Address Your Audience

Cultivating genuine connection with an audience starts by truly understanding their world.

On Stage

Stage performance

Public speaking

Eli

Pauley

Performance Faculty

minute read

Published on

June 2, 2025

Making small adjustments to your language onstage can help you connect more deeply with your audience and build the energy in the room.

Connection is a prerequisite for transformation. Before you change the way the individuals in your audience see the world, before you transform their way of thinking, and before you inspire them to take action and apply your message in their lives you must connect.

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The deeper the connection, the better.

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Genuinely connecting with another human being can be challenging. And connecting with an audience of 100, 500, or over a thousand people is a daunting task, to say the least.

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Some suggest that cultivating connection is as simple as using the pronoun “you” more in your speech. They say that this “magic word” can help your audience care about your message, and help you step into their shoes.

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Perhaps people are told to use the word “you” as a way to include their audience and make them feel like they’re on the hook for something.

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However, simply using the word “you” won’t automatically make your audience feel included or understood.

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And forming a deep connection with your audience starts long before you step onstage; and often, even before you start writing your speech.

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The Fundamentals for Deeper Connection

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Very often, when we ask folks who their speech is for, they respond and say their speech is for “anyone and everyone.” While many people could benefit from the message you share, your audience is not everyone.

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It’s much easier to connect with a specific group of people than with the whole world. That’s why we always encourage speakers to clearly define their audience, before they start writing their speeches.

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You see, it is through specificity that we create connection. If you don’t know your audience’s deepest desires, most challenging struggles, and what their day-to-day feels like, you’ll have a hard time connecting—no matter what pronouns you decide to use.

Full Transcript

Don't

assume your speech is for everyone. Specifically defining your audience can help you have greater success.

understand your audience’s world in order to craft a speech that’s relevant to them.

Transformational speakers connect with their audiences by (1) clearly articulating the problem they face and (2) truly understanding the impact of that problem. If you are able to do this, you’ll be able to connect with almost any individual in your audience.

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In GRAD | Speech Writing Mastery, speakers master the Foundational Five, the basic structure for creative and inspiring content development. This helps them lay the groundwork for a transformational speech, define and understand their audience, and build a deep connection before they even start writing their speech.

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Taking the time and putting in the work to profoundly understand your audience makes all the difference.

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Why Using “You” Just Isn’t Enough

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Simply using the pronoun “you” in your speech is no substitute for doing the deep work to truly understand your audience. You see, sometimes “you” doesn’t come across as inclusive, but rather pointed and accusatory.

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And if you don’t truly understand your audience, it might even come across as fake. This “quick and easy fix” is like putting on an army uniform without having made it through boot camp, understood the values and meaning of military service, and developed the unique sense of mission and duty that accompanies being in the army. You can pretend, but you’ll quickly be found out.

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On the other hand, the more you’re able to empathize with, acknowledge, and comprehend the fears, worries, hopes, and dreams of your audience, the more authentically you’ll be able to connect. You’ll describe their problems the way they would, express their deepest desires, and empathetically speak to them.

Don't

Even slight adjustments in language, performance, and feeling will cause your audience to respond differently to your speech.

Which pronoun did Martin Luther King Jr. use most in his speech?

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Martin Luther King Jr. connected powerfully with his audience in what is perhaps the most famous speech of all time, "I Have a Dream." Dr. King had a deep and profound understanding of what his audience suffered, what they lived and endured every day, and what their hearts longed for.

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Unsurprisingly, the pronoun he used most in his speech was not “I,” not “you,” not “they,” but rather, “we.”

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Perhaps this was a conscious decision, or maybe his pronoun choice flowed naturally from his profound empathy for and understanding of his audience. In a time of division and separation, his message was one of hope, love, and unity; using the word “we” helped Dr. King convey that message.

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The Power of “We”

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Using the pronoun “we” can be really useful as you craft your speech as well. “We” creates a sense of collective responsibility, a sense of community. Often it makes topics feel less pointed and more inclusive. It’s a welcoming word that implies that both the speaker and the audience are working together to overcome a problem and find a solution.

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Just imagine this powerful section of Dr. King’s speech, had he chosen to use different pronouns:

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“This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.”

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There is a power in the pronoun “we” that is almost palpable. Your audience will feel it as they hear it in your speech as well.

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A Few Practical Pronoun Tips

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Analyzing your speech and changing the pronouns you use might seem like a miniscule adjustment in your speech. But even small tweaks to your language onstage can make a big impact on the energy in the room.

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Try these practical pronoun tips during your rehearsal session and then notice how it lands with your audience.

#1 Determine which pronouns you use most.

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Take a look at your speech and highlight the pronouns you use, specifically I, you, we, and they. Use the search feature on your computer (control or command + F) to count how many times you use each pronoun.

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Which pronoun do you use most? If it’s “you” or “I” you might want to consider reworking those sections to make them more inclusive by using “we.”

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#2 Try replacing “you” with “we.”

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Test out sections of your speech replacing “you” with “we.” Choose a section of your speech that has a lot of pronouns. Perform this part of your speech as you originally wrote it, with the pronouns “you” or “I,” then perform it using the pronoun “we.”

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Record yourself and watch both takes. Can you feel the difference? Which version feels more powerful, more inclusive, more authentic? What takeaways are there to be learned?

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#3 Test it out onstage or in rehearsal groups.

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After you’ve revised sections of your speech and rehearsed them on your own, try testing out the newest version of your speech in rehearsal groups, or onstage at your next speaking event.

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When delivering your speech in rehearsal groups, remember to ask for specific feedback. You could say: “I’m going to deliver a portion of my speech in two different versions. I want you to tell me which version felt more inclusive.” Or you could ask: “On a scale of 1 to 7, how connected did you feel to this message?”

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Watch your audience and see how this latest iteration of your speech is received. You might notice a shift in the energy of the room, more head nods, a greater sense of engagement, and a deeper feeling of connection. Their answers will help you assess which changes to keep and where to continue iterating.

Don't

just change all the “you”s in your speech to “we”s. Always consider your purpose and how you want to make your audience feel when revising your speech.

test sections of your speech in rehearsal groups when you make these pronoun changes.

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“My speech is now far more nurturing, more inclusive, more me… and more revolutionary.”

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Joe Hudicka, speaker, entrepreneur, and Forbes Books author, told us he recently “overhauled” his speech using what he learned at HEROIC. When he sat down and took a look at the pronouns he used in his speech, he realized that he used the pronoun “you” 140 times, and the pronoun “we” 79 times.

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So he decided to try replacing “you” with “we” in the sections where it made sense, and tested it out with a table read.

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In this revised version, he cut down his use of the pronoun “you” to 66 times, and started using “we” much more often—a grand total of 125 times.

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He says: “I can FEEL the transformation as I read it in its new form. My speech is now far more nurturing, more inclusive, more me… and more revolutionary.”

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Simple Switch, Major Results.

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To truly connect with your audience, it’s essential to understand their world and the unique challenges they face. If you skip this essential step, it will be difficult to deliver value and build trust, no matter what pronouns you use.

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But if you do the deep work to truly see the world as your audience sees it, you’ll be able to craft a message that makes them feel seen, inspires them to act, and changes their lives forever. Adding the word “we” is a simple adjustment that makes a transformational speech feel more welcoming, inclusive, and supportive.

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As you iterate your own speech, you’ll notice where small adjustments have the potential to make a huge impact. By testing and rehearsing your speech, both in rehearsal groups and on your own, you’ll be able to refine and improve your delivery.

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Yes, it’s a simple switch. But often it’s the small adjustments that yield the most extraordinary results.

Don't

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Taking the time and putting in the work to profoundly understand your audience makes all the difference.

‍

Why Using “You” Just Isn’t Enough

‍

Dont

Which pronoun did Martin Luther King Jr. use most in his speech?

‍

Unsurprisingly, the pronoun he used most in his speech was not “I,” not “you,” not “they,” but rather, “we.”

‍

The Power of “We”

‍

Just imagine this powerful section of Dr. King’s speech, had he chosen to use different pronouns:

‍

There is a power in the pronoun “we” that is almost palpable. Your audience will feel it as they hear it in your speech as well.

‍

A Few Practical Pronoun Tips

‍

Try these practical pronoun tips during your rehearsal session and then notice how it lands with your audience.

#1 Determine which pronouns you use most.

‍

Which pronoun do you use most? If it’s “you” or “I” you might want to consider reworking those sections to make them more inclusive by using “we.”

‍

#2 Try replacing “you” with “we.”

‍

Record yourself and watch both takes. Can you feel the difference? Which version feels more powerful, more inclusive, more authentic? What takeaways are there to be learned?

‍

#3 Test it out onstage or in rehearsal groups.

‍

After you’ve revised sections of your speech and rehearsed them on your own, try testing out the newest version of your speech in rehearsal groups, or onstage at your next speaking event.

‍

Don't

just change all the “you”s in your speech to “we”s. Always consider your purpose and how you want to make your audience feel when revising your speech.

test sections of your speech in rehearsal groups when you make these pronoun changes.

“My speech is now far more nurturing, more inclusive, more me… and more revolutionary.”

‍

So he decided to try replacing “you” with “we” in the sections where it made sense, and tested it out with a table read.

‍

In this revised version, he cut down his use of the pronoun “you” to 66 times, and started using “we” much more often—a grand total of 125 times.

‍

He says: “I can FEEL the transformation as I read it in its new form. My speech is now far more nurturing, more inclusive, more me… and more revolutionary.”

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